Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Earth Day 2015

In recognition of  Earth Day and the ongoing global warming crisis, I would like to ask everyone to make a small sacrifice.  Could you please take the time to burn some gasoline?  I would suggest at least 20 gallons.  Now I know that most of us don't have the free time to go out driving around aimlessly today, so I have a couple alternative suggestions. 

The first would be to simply pour the 20 gallons of gasoline into an appropriate open container such as your back yard fire pit.  In the interest of safety, you should probably light it by means of a flaming arrow shot from a safe distance, though most earth day supporters would also cheer a reduction in population, no matter how small.

If you just can't get away from work for the sake of the environment, then please consider getting a jump start on gasoline burning by leaving your car idling in the parking lot during business hours.  Sure, that won't burn as much as one might like, but consider this; you can increase the burn rate significantly by the judicious placement of a brick on the foot feed (yeah, I grew up on a farm; for those who didn't, the foot feed is the gas pedal).

Now, this modest contribution to global warming will cost you about $50 depending on your local gas prices, but if enough of you contribute, the rewards for all of us could be significant.  April 22 and here in southern Minnesota we had snow flurries yesterday.  Global warming - give me some of that!  And remember, its for the children.

(If you have your own suggestions on how we can increase global warming, feel free to add them in the comments section)

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